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the internal battle of yoga

31 January 2012

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The physical of lifelong habits, biomechanical patterns to compensate for disability, an imperfect body, sports injuries, heat, allergy discomfort and a restless night due to an unwell dog. (As my husband put it to a colleague… “At 3.30am we were out walking to toilet him. At 4.30am we were washing his bum!”) Hee hee.

The mental of not feeling strong or naturally gifted like in other sports in the past – focusing on my own achievements and not the ego – realising how little I see – working out the poses that don’t hurt my eyes – remembering I’m doing damn well to be there – learning and remembering my strengths and weaknesses – thankful for a teacher who welcomed me and my disabilities – loving the beautiful women I now call friends – what kind of plant is that? I wonder if I could keep that alive? – what shall I cook for lunch? oops, don’t get distracted.

Ah yes, yoga is more than it looks. But when you’ve fought back tears throughout the class on a bad day, and suddenly you’re easing into a pose you never thought you would do, your posture is right and feels easy for the first time, it all comes together in that moment.

That little battle. That little victory.

How are you all going with your little internal battles?

* When a dog is flustered, they just shake it all out. Smart cookies.

4 Responses
  1. February 1, 2012

    This is good inspiration. Everyone I know loves yoga, and I just can’t connect to it. That said, I won’t give up!

  2. February 1, 2012

    Beautiful post!

    I love yoga for how it totally brings me within myself. My yoga studio is the one place where I don’t wear my glasses in public (because they fall off my face in the upside-down poses, and I don’t have contacts) and so I can’t see much at all that is going on around me. Something that would usually make me nervous, but in yoga it’s perfect because it stops me from checking on what everyone else is doing and how their poses look compared to mine. I just shut my eyes and concentrate on how my muscles feel (“moving out of thought and into sensation” as my teacher says), and when my mind and muscles come together and work together just so, it really is the most liberating feeling in the world.

    I hope your dog in feeling better and that you have got some more rest. xx

  3. February 4, 2012

    Ohhh … poor puppy! I hope he’s feeling better now.

    I would love to start practicing yoga, but I feel like I almost resist the stillness and reflection that comes with it … I really should overcome that.

    Those distractions are hard to keep at bay, but committing to the journey is the important thing, and you most certainly have the strength to do that. xx

  4. February 6, 2012

    Oh I hope he’s ok! Took me a long time to get into yoga too, I thought that if it wasn’t working me hard and making me sweat what was the point. Now I love it for how it makes me feel after, it really is so awesome. Lovely post!

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